Me and My Cell Phone

It all started out for security. Naw, we were not copy cats even though everyone, even kids, seemed to have one. But living in a large city with lots of traffic, frenzied freeways, dangerous parking lots (pocketbook snatching and runaway carts), we needed protection, especially for my wife.

We bought one of those cheapies mainly for emergencies. Ten bucks a month and we were secure (so we reasoned). Actually, it was a good idea. One never knows when a flat could occur, or a fender-bender, or worse.

But then we discovered how handy a cell phone is. We also realized there were some options like pay-as-you-go but generally, you pay for so many minutes whether you use them or not. If you go over, you pay dearly (or you go into no man's land where the phone probably won't work).

So, we use a cell phone for emergencies (hopefully few and far between) and long distance. We do not give our cell phone number to very many so most of our calls were to and from family and friends, and incoming wrong numbers. Initially, we could sign up for a year but generally now it is two years or more with a huge fee for opting out early. Competition seemingly hasn't initiated a cell phone war like the gas wars of yesteryear.

Today we see soccer moms driving huge SUVs, talking on the phone, drinking coffee, minding a bunch of kids in the back seats and cuddling a overly-friendly dog all at the same time. Amazing. One of the twentieth-century wonders.

Recently we moved into a state where our cell-phone provider was inoperative. We couldn't get a local number so we lived with a long-distance number. This meant I had to call long distance from home to reach my wife shopping at the supermarket simply to remind her if we needed more asparagus or flashlight batteries.

Ultimately we changed companies which served us locally and with the two-year contract we received a new cell phone. It is cute little flip up and fits nicely in the tiniest purse my wife will carry. Neat. But here the beauty ends. My senior moment arrived abruptly when I tried to operate the little contraption. Gradually I got the hang of it only to realize there were a zillion features in that tiny instrument I will never conquer much less use.

So much for modern technology in phones. Now let's go to TV. The older we get (and I think I speak for my wife as well), we watch fewer programs and even more rarely do we watch videos, CDs and DVDs. When I do view TV it usually is a two or three-way experience between 2-3 channels (sports and news normally as I jump back and forth during commercials). This has forced my wife to refuse to watch with me (nor do I blame her). But then, I don't always watch her programs either.

Then there's the TV remote which alone is another senior mystery at times. Combine this with a universal remote so one gadget will run all your gizmos effortlessly is another story. Then, there is Cable TV and its competitors. I suppose countless others including myself would be satisfied with perhaps 5-10 channels but we gotta pay for 70-80 channels more or less some of which we never watch. And so goes another electronic Senior Moment.